We can all agree that constant self-doubt is not healthy, but do we really know how it affects our mental health? Self-doubt is an emotion many of us have felt at some point in our lives. The way we choose to handle it, the frequency at which we choose to engage in it, and the duration we allow it stay with us, are what could make it either good or bad for our mental health.
Having self-doubt is not bad in itself because it exists to make us realise that we cannot always be right. By questioning ourselves, we can better examine our actions. Nevertheless, it is quite easy for us to constantly doubt ourselves in our quest to fit into a world of perfectionism.
The irony of this is that the more we doubt ourselves and our abilities, the less likely we are to feel motivated to achieve the things we want to achieve. Our quest for perfection thereby hinders us from achieving things, howbeit imperfectly.
Negative Self-Doubt
Self-doubt is negative when it begins to affect the following.
How you judge your capabilities: When you doubt the things you can do, your ability to learn and adapt, your ability to be successful in a new task, etc., you limit yourself negatively. I am not saying that you should think you know everything; far from it! You should in fact know that you don’t know everything, but you can learn anything that you wish to know.
Your self-esteem: Your self-esteem can be badly damaged when you consistently engage in self-doubt. Although some will say self-doubt comes when there is already low self-esteem, it can be the other way around. Take for example, a person who failed a school course begins to doubt that he/she is as smart as he/she formerly thought. The doubt lingers and because of this, the person gets disinterested in studying. Of course, the person will probably fail again and this time around, the failure will reinforce the idea that he/she is just not good enough. Soon, the self-esteem of this person is badly damaged.
Your relationship with others: When you live with constant self-doubt, you will likely begin to judge yourself in comparison with others. And soon enough, you will start to avoid them, even their presence will bring feelings of displeasure to you. Also, you because of how harshly you judge yourself, you are likely to think that others judge you in the same way. This would make you avoid them.
Your relationship with yourself: Self-doubt affects your relationship with yourself. It makes you subconsciously sabotage yourself because you don’t believe in yourself. When you convince yourself that you can’t do something, you will make less of an effort. This eventually makes you not get what you wanted.
How to Fix This
You can work on this by remembering to give yourself credit when due. Reassure yourself that you did the work for the things you have achieved and there is more that you can achieve. You can write a letter to yourself, give yourself a mental round of applause when you do something good, or celebrate your little wins with yourself and others who appreciate them. This does not mean you’re arrogantly bragging. You are only building yourself up for even more challenges and achievement- let this be your motive.
-Ebahi