Understanding Anger Management Issues
Anger is a natural, healthy emotion. Anger is an instinctive reaction to threats and it has its benefits. Some level of anger is required for our survival.
Understanding that anger only becomes a problem when you can’t control it, causing you to say or do things you’ll later regret. Uncontrolled rage is harmful to both your physical and mental health. It can also quickly escalate into verbal or physical violence, causing harm to yourself and those around you.
Did you know there are 5 types of anger communication styles?
They include:
Aggressive Anger. A person using this style of anger communication often feels the need to be in control of themselves, other people, and situations. To get what they want, people in this category frequently employ sarcasm, humiliation, menacing criticism, complaints, verbal or physical abuse, and threats.
Passive Anger. Passive anger is characterized by a desire to avoid conflict and confrontation. So, a person with a passive anger style works hard to avoid hurting others because it makes them feel guilty. They also avoid provoking others in order to avoid feeling uncomfortable.
Passive-Aggressive Anger. A person with passive-aggressive anger style is not as outwardly aggressive towards others as the aggressive style, and they also do not want to avoid conflict as the passive style does. Instead, when they are angry, they may employ the silent treatment, withhold their love, affection, and attention, gossip, or refuse to cooperate. In a way, passive-aggressive anger is a lot like gaslighting. When asked what is wrong, they frequently say “nothing,” despite the fact that their body language or behavior clearly indicates that something is wrong.
Projective-Aggressive Anger. People who use the passive-aggressive anger style may appear passive, but they are not. Since they are afraid to admit or express their anger, they tend to project it onto others. They may try to persuade others to act out their rage for them. They may tell you that you appear agitated when you are not.
Assertive Anger. People with an assertive anger style often express their needs in a straightforward, direct, and honest manner, rather than waiting for others to read their minds. Simultaneously, they consider the emotions and desires of others. They value themselves and expect others to treat them with dignity and respect.
How do you know if you are struggling with anger management issues?
Losing your cool every now and then does not indicate that you have anger management issues. However, if you do find yourself experiencing most, if not all of the following physical and emotional symptoms below, then you may be struggling with anger management issues.
Physical symptoms include:
- Increased blood pressure
- Increased heart rate
- Chest tightness
- Recurring headache or migraine
- Muscle tension
Emotional symptoms include:
- Irritability
- Frustration
- Anxiety
- Stress
- Feeling overwhelmed
- Guilt
A few tricks to help you tame your temper
The ideal aim of anger management is to control and regulate anger so that it does not cause further complications. Anger management does not mean you never get to express your frustration and hurt. It is imperative that you learn to express your anger in a healthy way. Without further ado, here are some tips and tricks to help you tame your temper
- Get familiar with the things that trigger you.
- Use the techniques below to control or release your rage;
- Deep breathing techniques. They are used to initiate the relaxation response, a state of physiological calm and release
- Use distraction techniques like dancing, having a shower, journaling, physical exercise, etc.
- Practicing meditation, or a form of meditation where you concentrate on shallow breathing, or breathing in and out, may help.
- Repeat a mantra that works (example: “You’ll be okay”, “try to relax”)
- Learning to be assertive by communicating your hurt and frustration.
Don’t wait for these emotions to take control of your life. If you need help maintaining control or you desire professional help, click here. There are people available to listen and offer assistance.